FML twice

By the end of the meeting today, my stress levels reached a feverish pitch.

I was so mad, I was trembling.

Not only was I mad at the company, I was mad at my fellow colleagues for not speaking a word.

For not backing me up.

And not only not backing me up, for PURPOSELY showing that they do not support me.

Yeah sure, I understand.

All you can think about is your own ass, covering your behind from any possible shots the company might throw at you.

All you can say is “Let it be. Cover ourselves. Don’t care.”

And at the end of the day, YOUR work will become MINE. For every mistake that you neglect to point out, the responsibility to do so will then become mine.

And you all wonder why I’m so stressed out, why I’m so mad.

So, this is why our country is in the shape it is in now. Because everyone is too lazy or is too afraid to step up, to stand out. Nobody thinks that it is important to excel in what we do, regardless of the politics or consequences that may come our way.

Nobody cares.

The Let Somebody Else Do It Attitude: Not so good when you’re that somebody else.

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FML

I am so tired of stressing out.

I’m tired of rushing to complete work that was not meant to be done by just one person.

I’m tired of watching other people sit back and slack.

I’m tired of people who know nothing trying to pretend they know everything (YAH! Since you know everything, you should know I’m talking about you!).

I’m tired of having to know everything.

I’m tired of people complaining they cannot finish their much much simpler work in 3 months, when I can finish my extensive work in 4 fucking days.

No, I don’t mind working.

It’s their attitude that I can’t stand.

I wish everyone would just pull up their panties and START WORKING, STOP COMPLAINING!

I’m tired of some Ali Baba business playing dirty tricks and running circles around us, while we entrap ourselves in our reluctance to JUST GET THE FUCKING WORK DONE.

I fucking have NO TIME and NO PATIENCE to listen to how it should be, how it could have been, to listen about ideals that OBVIOUSLY CANNOT MATERIALIZE.

I just want to hear how we can SOLVE THIS SHIT. NOW.

No, I refuse to accept that we will just wash our hands off and give up. Hopeless as it may seem, this is something we will face every single day of the rest of our careers here. How the fuck are we supposed to turn a blind eye and pretend the system works???

I’m tired of the damn fools playing hide and seek politics with me.

WHAT IS THIS???

You are (now) a multi-million company, have you no PRIDE? No sense of decency, responsibility, honesty?????

Doesn’t it seem common sense to you that when someone pays MILLIONS for something, they expect SOMETHING in return??? Anything?

This takes the cake. This really defies human logic.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHH!

Farewell & Lou Sang @ Work

After much hassle and many sleepless nights, Rosalind finally got the details of her PhD ironed out, and her date of departure confirmed. Another brilliant officer from the NCE Section was leaving in search of greener intellectual pastures. Boo. PhD tai sai meh damn boring ok.

Was put in charge of getting the gift (AGAIN! Gee, I wonder why…), which entailed creating an account at http://www.myBBstore.com.my to purchase a Thermos flask + food container set and delegating the task of acquiring wrapping paper + cards to someone who I would normally never trust with this, except that I had no time to get them myself lol, I hope you aren’t reading this.

As it turned out, the cutesy cards and super girlish wrappers plus the flask + container set from “Malaysia’s Preferred Online BABY Store”, when put together, seemed more like a present for a month old child than a farewell gift for someone leaving to acquire her PhD.
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Let me tell you the story about Rosalind.

When I first got into NCE, I was really quiet and blur, and Rosalind was given the task of telling me about some process flow thingy which I totally forgot already.

Halfway through the (boring) briefing, she asked me, “How many Li Pings are there in your batch?

I was caught off-guard for a split-second, before answering that yours truly is the one and only.

Then Rosalind was like “EH! I think I was your mentor in IMU lar!

Turns out, it was another one of those It’s A Small World moments.

The function of a mentor in IMU is to guide you through the gruelling 4 years of learning, to hand you notes, answers to predictable exam questions, tips on which lecturers suck, etc etc you get the picture.

And I obviously did not build much of a relationship with my mentor, because, well, neither of us were very committed to university life I guess.

NCE chicks: 2 insanely smart women + one incompetent child DSH!
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But ZOMG here she was again, this time mentoring me in my job. No, I wasn’t disappointed or anything lar haiyo because I  knew that she was like this super brilliant person. I would say that I was more intimidated than anything.

Now that she’s leaving, I know I’m going to miss her, because although I have a slight aversion towards building close ties with colleagues, I did learn a great deal from her, merely by the powers of observation.

Oh well, I’m memang like that wan la. I always have to lose something before I learn to treasure it. Haih.

The NCE team. Next to leave will be Zuraida (rightmost) sobs!
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The next day (which was a Friday i.e. 2.5 hour-long lunch), all the Chinese peeps at the office had lunch together to lou sang.

In total there were 50 people, and even Frost who is currently working in Watson’s @ First World in Genting, attended.

Rosalind: OMG her desk looks so neat in the picture.
Me: My desk IS neat la wth!
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The 9 of my table + Harry, the cameraman.
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Jakunz never seen a pink phone before.
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Steve draining off my precious phone battery, while Ravin (who is a Chindian, in case you’re wondering) looks on.
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My huneyboo “boyfriend” wtf.
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Voon Yuen still looks so cute ish.
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My huneys.
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God, what an obnoxious tie!
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CK’s camwhoring skill still needs a little tweaking.
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The yee sang had strawberries <333
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This is one yummy yee sang!!
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Nasib tak tumpah…
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Table groupie.
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CK giving me some scary eyeballing.
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This was the second annual loh sang lunch we’ve had with the bureau peeps, but it totally didn’t feel the same without the rest of our Gang 13 T.T I miss them! And I miss the acceptance we had, and the lack of politics and happiness and everything huu.

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Drove home after work, and it had been pouring dogs and cats so it took me one whole hour to reach back.

Brought the 3 babies out to waddle a bit in the mud since they are crabs, and crabs are supposed to like waddling in mud.

Geli earthworm.
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The earthworm decided to get acquainted with Rascal, and swam into his shell, giving poor Rascal a good shock.

The poor thing panicked, and quickly clambered onto Chloe and Chester lolz! Ah, what a joy they are.

MUMMY!!! Bring it away!!!
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Soon after, the cat got wind of what was going on, and wanted to eat my babies, so I had to bring them back in boo. I guess rearing different species of animals has its drawbacks.

But somehow these 2 are damn chillax.
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Kursus Induksi: Batch of 2008

Every year, the Ministry of Health organizes it’s Induction Course (Kursus Induksi) for all pharmacists, dentists and doctors who report for duty as officers in the MoH.

This year was no different.

The only sad thing was that they delivered the Letter of CCBness only on Thursday and the course was scheduled to be held from Saturday til Tuesday. WTH!!! Dahlah we were all supposed to attend a colleague’s wedding on Saturday boo.

Damn sad ok, thank goodness I had decided against buying a new dress for the wedding hmph.

Anyhuu, can’t complain lar cause Kursus Induksi-s were previously supposed to stretch over 2 (TWO!) whole weeks. Imagine, 4 days also I complain like mad edi, if it were 2 weeks I confirm mengamuk lor.

PLUS this time around it was held at Felda Residence Trolak (a “resort” kononnye) which had air-conditioning woohoo too bad for you older generation suckers who had to sleep with the bugs on bunk beds and bathe in communal bathrooms lol.

Although you can definitely bet you’re in for a bit of shit when the official resort website is at http://www.plantationresorts.com.my.

Packed my bags and said goodbye to the cat.
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Su-Ann, Bam Bam and I were roomies for the 3 nights =)
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“Nature-inspired” walkway.
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Wonderfully lala public telephone.
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By the time we had checked-in and settled down, it was time for (a very yucky) dinner.
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Surrounded by mountains and palm oil trees: No way to escape =(
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Jumping shot which turned into toilet bowl shot thanks to bad timing.
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Someone decided it was necessary to build a bridge over the drain.
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The entire course comprised of a series of lectures regarding government work ethics, government protocol and other general topics. Not really related to our professions per se, but I guess it’s good to get the groundwork going.

Paying full attention, yup yup…
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…yup yup yup.
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The classes lasted from 8.30am til 10.30pm so I guess it was understandable that everyone was exhausted towards the end.
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PCK I miss you!! T_T
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On the second night (Sunday), Su-Ann, Edm and I took a short drive to the tiny town of Sungkai to purchase a toothbrush, as Su-Ann had decided to leave hers at home.

And fate had it that right opposite the Indian sundry shop was a Chinese restaurant called “Choy Kee” that sold pork trotters!!! ZOMG!!!

It’s located along Jalan Besar Sungkai. Although in reality the road is anything but besar.
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Happiness.
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And of course we just HAD to share the joy with the rest of our buddies, so on the third and final night, we made the journey down to Jalan Besar Sungkai for yet another bowl of cholesterol and collagen laden goodness.

I know I look superbly horrible, but she looks so cute, so terpaksalah aku bersacrifice.
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Fidgeting while waiting for the food.
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Now this is what I call F.O.O.D. (got 12 of us btw).
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Boring group presentations made the 3 back there go, “Boo I can’t wait to go home”.
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28-24-39. And those are the ages, not my measurements (no way my ass is that big!). WTH that stupid fella is casting a shadow on my arm and making it look even thinner than it already is leh ish damn retarded looking.
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On the morning of our final day there, we had a short “quiz”, but luckily it wasn’t evaluated so no need kiasu lar. Otherwise I confirm die die.

OM NOM NOM.
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Kiasu Su-Ann wrote so bloody much stuff.
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Note how little effort it is taking me to produce all 3 chins.
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FAT 101.
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Random groupie.
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After everything was over and we had bid each other teary goodbyes, 7 of us berzoomzoom to the Sungai Klah hot springs (Taman Rekreasi Air Panas Sungai Klah) for a little R & R.

That boy is one lucky train driver!
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The nice people there allowed us into the Felda Residence Hot Springs resort, which consists of 5 private villas as well as a number of Deluxe rooms going for RM250 per night. Damn nice ok the place!! The only weird thing was that we were surrounded by a palm oil estate instead of coconut trees and such.

Beautiful landscaping.
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Failed group shot.
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The Sungai Klah hot spring park itself is this massive sanctuary of greenery and many many hot as well as cold pools. Not too sure how beneficial the water was to our skin tho cause I didn’t smell much sulfur.

WOOTS! Egg boiling wth.
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They had a spot designated for egg boiling, and it was a good thing we came prepared!

It so happened that we were served severely undercooked half-boiled eggs (they were more like 30%-boiled) for breakfast, so clever Su-Ann had the bright idea of tapau-ing a few eggs to recook at the hot springs.

Smuggled 5 of them stuffed down my water bottle plus another 2 wrapped up in tissues in Su-Ann’s bag. Damn cheapskate aunty skillz I know don’t kutuk pls.
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Very very very hot spring. Fall inside confirm become boiled human.
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Honeyboo and I at one of the huge pools.
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Boiling “eggs” lol.
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Oooh the hard work paid off!! (You just KNOW a girl doesn’t cook when she thinks boiling eggs are hard work)
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Yup. 25 years old, those two.
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Ice cream break!!!
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We finally came to the mother of all Sungai Klah hot spring pools: The Mountain Spring Pool. It was nice and cold and had the giant “octopus” slide thingy which was real cool and brought out the children in us.

And so we said, “Screw this, let’s just get wet!”. Or at least some of us did.
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*Splish splash*
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Woohoo!!!
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The wet vs the dry.
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Anyhoo, we were well prepared (some more so than others) and had brought along a set of dry clothes to change into. Some people *coughnotme* had even had the forethought to bring along soap, shampoo and conditioner wth.

Su-Ann and Mr Mahmud from Iran.
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Following our expedition, we were supposed to have bak kut teh at Sungai Buloh for lunch. But seeing as it was already around 2pm and we were all dying of starvation, we decided to swarm upon some random ulu place to ease our aching bellies.

After that, Edm dropped us girls at Su-Ann’s house where I took over and drove the other girls back to Subang.

Only problem was that I was so sleepy I couldn’t focus, and ended up ramming into the guard house palang. But luckily nothing happened to my car, don’t know about the palang. And then my GPS died so we had a slight panic attack.

Finally arrived home in one piece woots.

All in all, the Kursus Induksi turned out to be not as bad as I expected, especially since I attended with wonderful friends =)

Of a wedding and my babies

Early on Sunday, Voon Yuen, Su-Ann and I met up at Subang Parade of all places for breakfast and a brief shopping stint. Our mission was to buy matching stuff for our workplaces but it failed cause Parkson sucks.

EDM, being the smart one, only joined us later on, when we were more or less done with scouring Parkson.

And then, the 4 of us headed down to Klang to attend Azri + Maya’s wedding.

This was my first Malay wedding ever, and also the first time a friend was getting married (Jing Mein’s registration not counted) so I was understandably pretty excited. And that’s not even considering the fact that both Azri and Maya are colleagues of ours and we’ve been teasing them into getting married for a whole year!!!

Apparently Malay weddings aren’t as elaborate and extravagant as Chinese ones, so we dressed down in jeans and blouses (except EDM who wore a shirt lar).

Their wedding must be one of the more elaborate ones cause there was a massive row of lovely tents.
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There were people making cendol for the guests *slurps.
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The newlyweds looking resplendent in their matching outfits.
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Su-Ann honeyboo and I.
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Eng Tat, EDM, Voon Yuen, me and Su-Ann honeyboo.
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The cutting of the cake literally took 10 minutes cause so much photo-taking was going on.
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EDM looking damn aunty with his blue handbag.
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Adat resam bersanding.
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Groupie of the bureau gang + Linda’s bf (left-most).
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Chester holding the wedding invitation and the super cute doorgift-bag.
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Random: Su-Ann honeyboo bought me a bellystud from Thailand as a souvenir/Xmas gift =)))
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We weren’t there for very long before it started raining BAH spoiler betul. But anyway most of the guests, who had probably been there all morning, were beginning to leave, so we all wished the couple our very best wishes and left.

Congrats Azri and Maya!!! =)

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Brought Chloe and Rascal home today, cause I wanted to change their sand. The one I had bought was synthetic and probably wasn’t very healthy for them.

Susah-payah went to Summit after work in search of sand, and found it at the Creepy Crawly shop, as I had expected. Damn expensive – 4.5kgs cost me RM55!!! Geez I’m really investing a whole lot here! Bought a little hollow kayu thingy for them to hide inside too.

Their re-refurbished home and my horrible parquet floor.
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Rascal looking super adorable!
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Love those beady eyes!!!
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Rascal giving me some sexy leg action.
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Rascal on the left, Chloe on the right.
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Besides the slight variations in their shells, I can tell them apart by their personalities – Chloe is waaay more chicken than Rascal, as demonstrated by this photo.
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So I’m like really glad they didn’t die over the long weekend when I left them alone at the office. As a matter of fact, I sorta think their time alone did them good, cause they seem a lot more active now =)

Random: I got a new maid, and she arrived a day before the old one left. Good coordination allows the old to teach the new the ropes.

My dog who has bitten countless people always seems to be able to tell the maids apart from non-maids, and always gives them a fond welcome cause he knows they’ll be the ones feeding him wth.
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Oh yeah and whilst I was choosing the sand, the petshop man asked if I liked the outdoors and I lied and said okok. Then he invited me to join him on some camping trips and I was like OH NO lol. As much as I adore nature, I will probably never go camping ever!

Happiest Day of the Year

So the happiest day of 2008 was when I got my posting letter stating that I was to be posted to the bureau.

Guess what the happiest day of 2009 is?

Lol.

WEEEEEEEEEEEEE got posted back to the bureau. For the next 3 years (probably). Super happy!!!!

Thank you god, thank you Ministry of Health, thank you bosses! <333 muak muak I love all of you. Even though I always complain about work, I swear I will turn over a new leaf and become super rajin!!!

K, now all that's left to do is to go to Putrajaya to collect my posting letter; only then will me future be confirmed. Takut nanti we terdengar salah over the phone and I actually got Sarawak or something boo.

Can't wait to hold that impossibly important document in my hands. Please En Osman, please don't give us the wrong information hor.

*crosses fingers.

1st-Year-of-Working Anniversary

Namun takkan mudah bagiku
Meninggalkan jejak hidupku
Yang telah terukir abadi
Sebagai kenangan yang terindah

– Not really related to following post

Rumor has it the posting results will be out on the 12th of November – right smack on my birthday.

Geez. Birthday wishes had better come true.

Today makes it exactly a year since I started working gosh and golly. WEEE 365 days already!

I can’t say I’ve learnt the most I could possibly have. I’ve always been a slow learner I guess – taking my own sweet time to warm up to things and to adjust and adapt and to slowly crawl out from under that thick coconut shell I like to call my comfort zone.

But what I can say is that throughout this year, I have gained invaluable life experiences – things not quite related to work, not technical in quality; these are aspects that upgrade our lives from monotonous survival to lives that are rich and fulfilling.

For one, I’ve always been the sort who bonds for life, but those I bond to are unfortunately few and far apart. Perhaps it’s because of my inherent tendency to distrust people from the start. Jaded, I think.

However, being with the people I’ve been with the past year has slowly eroded this defensive wall I could never fully knock down on my own (although I have taken the sledgehammer to it, my work was never complete). Whilst the people who knew me back then would describe me as having frustratingly immovable tendencies of keeping things to myself, the past few months have seen me unleashing torrents of rantings and random emotional outbursts on these people whom I see everyday.

Whoops.

Besides “opening up”, as they call it, I also find myself becoming ever so slightly more responsible. Stop that now. I can hear you rolling your eyes.

I vividly recall the first month I worked. Oh lord, I swear I had the urge to ditch work every single morning at 6.00am. And in fact, I sure has hell did, a few times too many.

Twelve months down the road however, my body now wakes itself up like clockwork every single morning at 6am. Even on weekends which is goddamn annoying. Usually the part of my body involved is the good ol’ bladder, begging to be relieved. Strange but true.

Not too sure if that’s considered being responsible, but I like to think it is. At least I’m not doing as I please (quite as much) anymore.

And of course, I’ve also wisened up to the cruel reality that the world is never really that simple, and that the people in it strive only to accomplish their own motives.

But then again, selfishness is probably one of the prerequisite human traits that drive us to succeed – as we move to bring improvement into our lives and bring improvement to the lives of others who play a role in our lives, which will then of course inadvertently further improve our own lives yadda yadda.

Take the example of “love”. When we fall in love, it’s usually (I say usually because this probably doesn’t stand true for you sadistic/masochistic weirdos) because that one person makes us feel like a better person. Suddenly, we become more confident, and they become our confidant. We know we are no longer alone. That person is a reflection of what we think should/could/would make us more perfect. Whole. Complete.

Thus, lending a perfect example to the selfish “I” syndrome. I feel like a better person. I feel happier. I feel whole. I love him/her.

In reality, first and foremost, we love ourselves.

Hmmm. Which could be why most people who have “issues” and who haven’t come to terms with their flaws and who do not in fact “love themselves” (yup, you broken screwed up thing, pwned for life) find difficulty in maintaining life partnerships.

I probably fit right in there quite nicely aw shucks.

Anyhuu, it’s just a thought, don’t quote me on this.

Yeah so today I blow a candle to my one year of working at the bureau. In a few days from now I’ll blow another 23 to being uhhh 21 *cough* AND hopefully to continuing my journey through life, nice and happy at the bureau, where we all know I belong =)

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